It’s better than a mass e-mail

I know, I know. I haven’t written in a while. Stop nagging me. How about a “hey, welcome back”? Or a “how pleasant to see you here. I can’t wait to see what you’ve got for us!” That would be better.

I am starting something new on this blog. I have decided to post a photo a day (or I will certainly aim for daily, but we’ll see how it goes). There will likely be some kind of writing with it, but I am getting into my new camera these days and thought that would get me back to posting here.

So let’s begin. This inaugural post will feature two photos, one from yesterday and one from today, because I couldn’t resist this scene last night of my sweet husband and my sweet pup curled up on the couch together watching Lost. Both are their sweetest at this time of day.

I had to include both shots because I couldn’t decide which one was better and I am still playing around with the settings on my camera. I’ll save you the washed out shot with the flash where Bean just looks plain pissed.

And then today’s entry is a look at these delicious roasted peas we bought last weekend on our way back from Assateague Island.

They taste crunchy and green with a bit of salt and oil. Perfect. And summery. Mmm peas. Apparently there was a time in my life when I hated peas, and in fact I recall seeing a photo of me as a wee child wearing a half of a serving of mashed peas, with the other half splattered all over my mother and her kitchen. Sorry ’bout that, Mom. Not sure I was too into peas as a baby, but I assure you, I have grown to love them frozen, cooked and roasted.

Something about the words “neti pot” make me think of the song Smelly Cat that Phoebe sang on Friends. You remember it: “Smelly cat, smelly cat. What are they feeding you?” Kind of like how sometimes when I am brushing my teeth, I get that song from childhood in my head that goes “Do your ears hang low, do they wobble to and fro…” It’s unclear why, perhaps something in the cadence of the words.

So I thought I’d write a song about the new neti pot I just bought to be sung to the Smelly Cat tune. Then I thought that would be even too ridiculous for me. Plus I am not quite sure I am ready sing praises, as a song might suggest.

Instead I will simply explain my neti experience. I have rejected the idea of flushing my sinuses with salt water for some time. Hippy shit, if you ask me. Give me a hearty Benadryl and see you in a couple hours. But as time has passed and I have embraced more of the simple lifestyle, I have begun to reconsider the neti (among other previously hippies-only items such as natural peanut butter and Amy’s organic pizza). Oh and I am poor and spending $17 every 10 days on Claritin D was getting to be a little much.

Enter the neti.

I bought it at CVS and gave it a try for the first time the other night. Here’s how it goes: Beginners start with a half packet of salt mixture, add lukewarm water and stir. Put tiny spout of pot into nostril, lean head forward and tilt to the side. Soon enough, the water will come dribbling out of your other nostril.

Surprisingly, my head didn’t explode. I expected a choking, coughing explosion of snot and water, but nothing of the sort happened. It was pretty tame and not entirely uncomfortable. A few noseblows later and my sinuses felt clearer.

It’s hard to say if the neti pot has entirely changed my life. I did it last night and still woke up at 5 a.m. with a stuffy nose and breathing out of my mouth. And today, oh today. My nose was running during my morning dog walk, but I ignored it and put off taking a Claritin. Then at work it got worse, but right when I needed it the most, I didn’t have that lovely expensive magic pill with me. Dang. So I toughed it out all day (and went through two boxes of Kleenexes). Home now I tried the neti pot again, and it helped a bit, but I still feel that swollen face, itchy eye, sneezy nose feeling. So I just took a Claritin.

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In other news, starting last Friday, I am giving up sweets and cutting out alcohol during the week. I know what you’re thinking: ‘Sweets? Who cares? Peace out. But no alcohol? Have you lost your damn mind?’ I wondered the same thing. But it’s my vanity, you see. Summer is around the corner, and I have to do something drastic to at least feel like I am getting into shape. Plus, I was finding that I was mindlessly eating every single Hershey’s kiss and gummy Lifesaver I saw lying around on tables and in bowls at the office. Worthless sweets abound there. I am all for indulging in a real treat – like, say my friend Kate’s cookies, which are spectacular and worth every single calorie – but the sugar that’s not even worth it, that doesn’t even really taste good, but once you have one you’ve had 10, is out of here. So far, I don’t really miss it. Now, cutting out the post-work beer or the glass of wine in the evening? That might just be a momentary lapse of reason, but consider it an experiment.

Oh wow. It’s been a long time since I wrote anything. Shoot. I meant to keep this thing going.

I don’t have an excuse, really. I am sure I could think of a few good things to say from time to time, but the blog kind of dropped off my radar when I got a job. Now the woe-is-me unemployed writer blog thing doesn’t really jam any more.

But let me just say a few things. In list form, of course.

1. I decided recently I hate the word “webinar.” I just hate it. It sounds like a fungus. Or the name of an alien species, assuming there are species of aliens and not just one big group.

2. Just about three weeks post-Lasik, I am seeing like a champ. Really, it’s spectacular. I realized it again after yoga the other night, a time when I am usually seeing all cloudy thanks to dry sticky contacts. Sweet surgical success for sure. I recommend it. Especially if it fits into your zombie plan, as it does for a certain friend of mine who indeed has a loose plan for when the planet becomes overrun by zombies. Among his preparations is Lasik, because really, getting your glasses smashed by a zombie lessens your chances for escape. For me, I didn’t need the inevitable threat of zombies to convince me that being able to see rules.

3. My new job is going really well. I will admit the pace has taken some getting used to, but this is a good thing. It’s not human to work like we used to at the newspaper – or at least it’s not awesome once you’ve experienced the alternative. That includes not always eating your lunch either in front of the computer, in the car on the way to cover something, or while you’re on the phone. It also includes the occasional 4 p.m. food contest. Today’s was how many peeps can you fit in your mouth. (No, I did not participate.) It was a dead tie with five peeps as the limit until the exec ed came and crushed all the sissies with a whopping seven peeps. Legendary.

4. I also now have some free time on my hands. Not that the hours of new gig are way different or that I am messing around all day. But when I do leave work, I am not a mashed potato-brained mess that only finds comfort in a beer or a warm bath. So I guess I kind of need a project. Something extracurricular other than yoga. Time to take up knitting again? Painting perhaps? Blogging even?

Well, it’s just been a day, but so far, my Lasik surgery was a success.

The surgery was insane, by far the scariest thing I have ever done in my life.  As comfortable as I felt with the surgeon and her staff and as much as I had committed myself to doing it, I still was a wreck during the procedure. It’s completely counter-intuitive. There I was lying in a chair while someone futzed with my eyes with lasers?  I kept thinking about the eye surgery scene in Minority Report. But they gave me two small yellow stress balls to squeeze, which surely helped keep me still if not calm.

And the doctor talked me through the entire thing. Her assistant was counting down the time for each laser (the one that cuts the flap and the one that does the reshaping), while she was talking about what was happening and reminding me to breathe, which turned out to be a critical reminder.

A lot of Lasik accounts tell you about how your vision fades out, and that part didn’t bother me at all. I actually found it a little relaxing. And yes, the smell of the laser is a bit disconcerting, but no more than the entire procedure, really.

So after about a minute for each eye, I was told I could sit up and open my eyes. It took me a minute to relax all my muscles and sit up. Then I was driven home and took a nap – or at least laid down and drifted in and out – for about four hours. I woke up able to see. It was hazy last night and still a little bit today, but all in all, I can see. It’s spectacular and really unbelievable. I mean, this was done just yesterday. In my follow up this morning, I was told my eyes are healing well, all looks good, but a little dry. I have to remember to keep putting rewetting drops in my eyes.

Right now it kind of feels like I still have dirty contacts in, but I expect that to fade as my eyes heal. And so far, I am pleased with the result and so glad I did it. I mean, 20/20 vision? Who would have thought someone who couldn’t read the alarm clock unless it was inches from my nose would one day be able to see unassisted? Spectacular.

One other thought about having this surgery: This is something pretty far out of my character to do. I am an anxious person. I worry a lot, often expecting the worst or convincing myself bad things might happen. I tend to lose sleep over things, just worrying them to death. But this time, I didn’t. Yes, I was anxious and yes, I was in hyper research overdrive for the week leading up to the procedure. But once I decided I was doing it, I became calmer and more in control. I challenged myself to have this experience, to be confident and positive about it, and I was. This is huge for me.

Because this blog is named “it’s better than a mass e-mail” with the intention of being a self-absorbed forum on Sara for anyone who cares, I thought it might be time for an update on my life. And because I like lists, I will conduct said update in list form.

1. First the big news. I am soon to be gainfully employed again. That’s right, funemployment is quickly drawing to a close. I can’t believe how quickly the weeks have flown by. What have I even been doing this entire time? Walking the dog, working on the kitchen cabinets, some freelance, some Bloody Mary drinking, coddling babies, cooking, working out some, writing, reading, walking the dog some more. (Wow this could have been a sublist on its own.) It doesn’t sound like much, does it? I didn’t write a novel or paint a series of landscapes or knit a sweater. Meant to, though.

2. Oh I guess I should give more on the job part. I will be an associate editor for a trade magazine that covers the business side of running a medical practice. This way I get to still write, get some experience editing, and stay in the general health care field, which rules. And my guess is I won’t come home at the end of a spectacularly long day feeling like I had the shit kicked out of me. I actually can’t believe I got the job, mainly because I didn’t know anyone who works there (I got most of my past jobs by knowing someone). I applied through Monster, which I figured was just like tossing your resume out into the ether to get lost among thousands of other more qualified laid off journalists. And I come from a newspaper background – one sensational free start-up tabloid paper in particular – that has seemed to at times be a strike against me. But hey, I got it.  I am so relieved and excited and a little nervous. Oh, and sad that unemployment is ending, but really, how many kitchen stools can I repaint or cabinets can I sand, and how many more walks with the dog around the neighborhood can one girl take?

3. I am feeling more and more comfortable with the Lasik eye surgery. I am actually really excited to write about it, and after writing yesterday’s post, I am feeling more confident about the decision and the doctor and the whole agreement in general. I just am waiting to chat with one of her patients and to see some kind of agreement in writing that explains everyone’s expectations. In the meantime, I have confirmed that wearing my glasses sucks. Also, I spoke with yet another friend last night who had it and loves it, and another who said, “It’s basically routine now,” which further put me at ease, because I tend to follow and trust my friends.

4. I have completely lost control of my dog. She eats everything in sight, and in Baltimore, that can be pretty toxic. If I was a more patient person, I would spend more time training her, but I haven’t quite figured out what command corresponds with “stop eating that poop” or “drop the chicken bone.” I am open for suggestions.

5. I am heading down to Alabama tomorrow morning for a long weekend to see my family. I haven’t seen them since November, and I generally think they are awesome. My step-brother just turned 21 and with each passing year he becomes more mature and kind and smart. And my dad just turned 60-something, and I think each passing year for him has made him more reflective, more balls-to-the-wall about what he believes in, and perhaps a little crazy. He told me the other night (besides the “God not giving frogs wings” comment), that some people have better health outcomes because of luck and social networks. Fat people hang out with fat people; those with hypertension tend to share social circles with others with hypertension (apparently studies show this). I am healthy, and my friends and family are healthy, so my chances for a better outcome (in the case of Lasik, specifically) are increased. And, he said, I have good luck so it will all work out. Sometimes bad things just happen to people because they have bad luck, but I am not one of those people. That’s according to my dad. Right.

6. Just as I am feeling good about being gainfully employed and getting my life plan (whatever that might be) back on track, my friends’ company is in peril. Nearly a half of my friends here in Baltimore work at this company (with the other nearly half of my friends married to them), where they have been given a 60-day notice that they could close. I guess they kind of saw it coming, but it stinks. Most of them have new babies or are expecting. Yipes. I worry about what they are going to do, and selfishly, I don’t want them to all move away. They are what makes Baltimore awesome.

7. I have been contemplating the fate of this blog recently, and I am not sure if I will keep it up. I sure do like the journal style writing, and even though I might have two readers on a given day, I like knowing the words aren’t just squirrled away in a Word document on my computer. But knowing I am starting a new job soon, will I still have it in me to rap on WordPress? We’ll see.